Mixed Signals: This Is Us
Welcome to Mixed Signals, the weekly newsletter from me (Gareth K. Thomas 👋), helping adults understand children with trauma.
From My Notes
We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are.
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When you’re in a threat state, everything looks like a threat.
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You’re Always Building Your Own House. [Sahil Bloom]
From My Inbox
“I live my life striving for perfection, and you want to know why?! Because I live in fear that if I let up for a moment, I will remember that I’m unwanted. And then what will happen to me?”
+ I have been loving This Is Us. It’s a story, beautifully and intelligently told, across two separate timelines. In one timeline, we watch triplets grow through their childhood. In the other timeline, we watch those triplets navigate their adult lives. The quote above is from Randall, who was adopted. It’s one of many quotes that hit me right in the stomach.
Jonny Miller on Feel Better, Live More
“So until they actually go through the process of having just whole, unprocessed foods for two weeks, they have no idea just how much their processed food diet is affecting them in terms of energy, vitality, and how they experience the world. And I kind of see a similar thing with the nervous system ... Many people are walking around with these kind of tight and wound up nervous systems that they think is normal, yet they don’t realise that there is another way to experience the world out there”
+ I’ve been a fan of Jonny’s work for some time now. I was fortunate enough to join a cohort for his excellent Nervous System Mastery bootcamp last year. I was so pleased to see Jonny on Dr Chatterjee’s podcast. The episode doesn’t disappoint.
From My Week
+ On Thursday, I attended a quarterly Public Involvement Board meeting for CASCADE. Always great to hear about the incredible work being done there.
+ As part of my role supporting incredible foster families, I joined in with our specialist support group for children who’ve experienced sexual harm.
+ On Friday, Mandie and I hosted a live session for parents preparing for the summer holidays, with a particular focus on avoiding compassion fatigue.
+ Later this week, I’ll be delivering a training session on Supporting Development & Learning in Young People for one of my clients.
From Me
Across the last decade of learning about early-life trauma, the concept I found most difficult to understand was shame, which was tricky, as it’s also one of the most foundational and essential.
After a long time of trying, it started to click. And that understanding unlocked a whole new level for me as a parent. Things that had seemed nonsensical now appeared perfectly logical.
Here I share, in simple terms and building on the great work of others, what shame is.
+ Find this on: The Clarified Blog
Could I help you?
I help adults understand children with trauma.
Could I help you? Reply to this email, or connect with me below.
~ Gareth ❤️🩹
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